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Six Things Emotionally Secure People Do More Than Others
(Originally appeared at naturalnews.com)
Here are six things that emotionally secure people tend to do.
Many people fear apologizing because it may create a perception of weakness. Fearing a hit to the ego, people hold onto a false sense of security.
Apologizing leads to greater empathy, connection, fairness – and has even settled lawsuits. Would you rather have a big (if fragile) ego or be connected to someone? Studies show that when you sincerely apologize, you receive empathy. This empathy is a powerful connection to another person.
Empathy is a sign of maturity and emotional security.
2. Go ‘Second Position'
In NLP, we call it the second position. It refers to your ability to put yourself in someone else's ‘perceptual position.' In other words, how well can you identify with what someone else is thinking or feeling?
If you cannot do this, emotional insecurity will rule your life. We are social creatures. If you cannot identify with others, you are destined to feel isolated and alone.
3. Accept failure
Emotionally secure people can recognize and accept failure. This may be why two top prep schools in England teach failure as part of their intended curriculum.
At Oxford Prep School for Girls, the administration created tests that were impossible to achieve 100%. Intentionally setting their students up for failure allowed teachers to mentor students on resiliency.
4. Handle self-criticism
Self-criticism is a universal stumbling block. It may be the most common psychological hang up in existence. The inner critic is pervasive and no one is immune. Constant self-criticism (even if it involves replaying parental criticism over and over) creates a ton of insecurity.
Emotionally secure people handle their inner critic and do not allow it to get the best of them. There are several ways to do this. You can befriend your inner critic by listening to it and extracting the value behind the criticism. You can train your mind to be still. You can tune into the present moment (the external world) where there is calm and quiet.
5. Step back
Taking a more objective viewpoint on your own life gives you access to the big picture. Emotionally immature people tend to be more impulsive and make poor decisions, which only creates more problems to feel insecure about. One solution is to step back and consider the big picture before making decisions.
6. Focus on happiness, not being right
That age-old question applies here: Would you rather be right or be happy?
Imagine: you get to be right all the time, but you are miserable. Or, you get to be wrong much of the time, but totally happy and content with your life. Which do you choose?
Most people choose to be right and miserable. One ridiculous study even claimed that it is better to be right than to be happy. In the study, a husband decided to agree with his wife, no matter what, for a while.
In the end, he became so miserable that he had to end the study. Therefore, researchers began to conclude that being right may be preferable to being happy.
This study just proves that blind agreement even when you disagree makes you miserable. Duh.
The key is not to blindly agree and be wrong for no reason. The point is to be open to when you are, in fact, wrong and freely admit it. When you legitimately disagree, then stick to your guns. Of course, if you legitimately believe you are right all the time, then you need more help than this article can offer.
(Read more at naturalnews.com )
5 MORE Things Secure People Just Don't Do (Low Self Esteem Test)
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